In Some Ways, It Makes Me Feel Like A Bad Dad
Part 2 in a series about worries: Concerns around moving to Spain
We recently started a series about worries and concerns around moving to Spain.
So much of those points and the things we’ll touch on in this series have to do with uncertainty. As much as we both love not knowing exactly what to expect, it’s tough to be completely comfortable with not knowing exactly what to expect.
Also, it’s easy to amplify concerns in a new and different setting, especially a setting that’s an ocean away and thousands of miles away from your present setting.
While this makes some sense, it’s not necessarily sensible.
Coincidentally, recently wrote about the freak out she had the night before she relocated to Spain in The Fear & Thrill of Moving to Another Country—
What I’m sharing below I wrote years ago, the night before I took my one-way flight to Spain, knowing that I might never move back to the U.S. The move wasn’t meant to be a temporary move, it was meant to be permanent. But despite my certainty in my decision, the pending permanence in the moment felt too overwhelming to handle at the time. In that moment, engulfed with the fear of the unknown …
I wrote the reflection that night for two reasons. In part to process what I was feeling, and in part to become my own cheerleader in a moment of fear and to dare to dream that this journey would be worth it. And sitting here in the present moment, it was worth it, and continues to be worth it to this day.
I value the reflection below because it captured a rare moment. A rare moment that may have been erased as the roots of my life in Sevilla extended and enveloped the fear I had once felt. As I settled into my life in Sevilla, the joy and gratitude was so overwhelming, I may have forgotten I ever was worried to take that first step to begin with.
As we prepare to book one-way flights to Spain soon, this resonates with me and Melisse. It not only provides a sense of emotional comfort, but a reaffirmation of how we think things might unfold emotionally, as explained in the above-linked post.
One of the biggest challenges we face is missing our daughters and all that this entails.
Because the background and nature of our relationships with our respective daughters are different, I don’t want to speak much for Melisse here. Instead, I plan on interviewing her about this—as well as her pending career transition—for the final installments of this series.
Maybe it will be the written word only. Maybe it will be a podcast. Maybe a video. Not sure. We’re thinking about how to structure it. But—bottom line—in these areas (parenthood and work), Melisse can offer a perspective I think (many of) you will find useful. And it’s a perspective I simply cannot provide.
Anyhow, I can provide my own perspective.
And, at times, when I think about moving to Spain, I feel like a bad Dad.